Restaurant dining seems to elicit no shortage of responses, often more in the negative than the positive column. Someone did not like this; the food was too hot or ice cold. No one came by to check on us. The litany goes on with many complaints echoed on food listserves with screams about lack of compensation. Should servers be penalized for every mistake from the kitchen? Should the chef waltz out and check on every diner? What is the role of the manager and must he compensate every irate diner or minuscule incident of displeasure.

NO, NO, and NO. Yes, we are eating in the equivalent of someone’s home when we dine out, but we need to be good guests, too. The definition of manners becomes eroded when guests make unreasonable demands or when managers overstep their boundaries and speak rudely to wait staff. Nothing far-fetched about these incidents; all occur. Holding everyone in check is really the responsibility of management and no one needs to know the secrets of training, just the end results: A smooth operation with everyone playing an appropriate part.

Let’s play out a recent situation. A four-top was finished with lunch. No one had stopped by from the time the plates were put down and the end of the meal. The server came to clear and saw that one guest had not eaten the protein in the center of the plate atop a field of salad greens. Shall I wrap that up she inquired? No, no thank you, was the reply; I did not care for it. Plates were cleared. Nothing further was said. Table conversation continued while awaiting the check.

Then the smart process went into play. Within minutes a sparklingly dressed young man, white shirt and tie, asked if he could join the table. He very calmly wanted to hear what was the problem with the dish. He immediately said the item had been removed from the check, although no one asked for that to happen, but he wanted to know what they had done wrong. Overcooked? Undercooked? Heavily seasoned? He was genuinely interested in discussing the process of preparation and the end result. Very smoothly handled.

Aha: Training at its best. The server knew what to do. The manager had the personality and skill to communicate, and the guests left impressed. This was not high-end dining but a casual, mid-tier chain that understands its part in the restaurant universe.

Not that difficult, but that important. Many could learn from this little one-act play. The lines are not that difficult to understand. A smooth operation means everyone knows his part.